TIME TO DANCE

“a time to dance….” Ecclesiastes 3:4

Just over a week and a half ago, I thought I was done dancing professionally. I was trying to convince my heart that I was. I was trying to be okay with it. Some days, I was fine….happy to be free from it….but lots of days, I felt the heart-tug….the desire to move across the floor, the desire to sweat, the desire to feel sore muscles, and the desire to dive into different characters on the stage again.

Dancing can be a love/hate relationship. It asks a lot of you. It asks for time, commitment, energy, pain, effort, passion, and heart. During the last year, I have often thought that I no longer have time to give that to dancing. When it comes to my dancing, I have often been a bit of a perfectionist. I could easily justify that I cannot give dancing my all in this season of life and therefore it’s not worth trying. I can think of a million reasons why I should stop dancing. In fact, I turned 35 last month, and I suppose, I thought…it’s time to stop.

When I was a young professional dancer, it was about physically attaining perfection…in the way my body looked, in my ballet technique…

I now understand this quote by George Balanchine…

“I don’t want people who want to dance, I want people who have to dance. ” 

For me, I need to dance. It does something to my soul. And I know it’s a divine situation going on in my heart. It’s no longer about being the leading dancer….it’s no longer about rising to the top of a company…it’s no longer about dancing principle roles…..it’s about needing to dance because it simply nurtures my soul….plain and simple.

I feel so blessed to have people in my life who are encouraging me to keep dancing….thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I know there will be days when my body hurts, and it feels like I cannot push past it.

I know there will be days when “not good enough” thoughts try to creep in.

I know there will be days when I get too focused on how my body looks, and forget that that’s not what it’s about.

But….I hold on to this….

it’s “time to dance…”

I hope you make time for whatever it is that nurtures your soul, sweet one.